March 12 or so, 2020.
Life was good. I was doing my everyday thing. I participate in a several nice groups and organizations locally, enjoying our get togethers. I have met some wonderful new friends over the last couple years of my life, and every time I saw those great people our friendships deepened. I shopped at my beloved little market, made my fun trips to my favorite CVS and RiteAid. And the dollar store-the bane of my shopping existence. I saw my family on a regular basis, and we always have a lot of fun getting together. It is loud, noisy, and always entertaining. Speaking of family, one of my relative's teams was in the thick of state playoffs, and that was very exciting as well. They were just one of "those teams" that were magic. The prospect of state championship was very real, and it was a great time. Things like that just do not happen every day, and I was having a lot of fun being along for the ride. The last time I was at the grocery store was that Tuesday. The clerks at the cash register were wearing masks and wiping down the grocery conveyor belt after every customer left and the new one came. I had the thought at the time that I needed to stock up. This scary new, unknown disease COVID-19 was starting to spread around the United States, and it was only a matter of time before I knew it would appear in my area. So, I did stock up and made sure that I had enough of everything because I really did not want to be out and about much. Just three days later, it was announced that schools were being shut down. The dominoes started to fall, only essential stores were allowed to remain open, workplaces deemed non-essential were shutting down as well. The first COVID case hit our county, and life was brought to a screeching halt in our country. On a national level, we never really experienced any kind of shutdown in my lifetime. This new disease was being considered a pandemic in other parts of the world, but it did not quite meet that level here in the beginning. My parents, now both over the age of 65, were being encouraged to stay home. I did not see anybody during that time. On a personal level, the idea of staying inside was not that foreign to me. I went through a period of my health being poor and I was confined to my home during that time. Yes, it sucks. Not being able to get out and experience the world can bring depression and isolation. I had to laugh at the people freaking out over the prospect of (gasp!) being home as some new concept. I was more fearful than depressed or unable to adjust in the beginning. I thought that there were going to be millions of people dying and that we were all at such a high risk that even the mere fact of touching something that came into your home was putting you at risk. I washed down groceries that came in, I put packages outside in my yard before bringing them inside. (I still do that and remarkably, none have been stolen!) My luck had run out with groceries by that time, and I had to make a trip to the market. I was absolutely terrified to go in. That trip was still before they knew that COVID was a mouth borne disease. I was impressed that we were all stopped at the front doors with a worker handing out gloves if we did not have them. No masks, though. It was surreal. Some of the workers looked like something out of the movies. The ones handling fresh food had on full helmets with what looked like pure white body suits. It felt like I was in an episode of the Twilight Zone. We couldn't have Easter that year as a family, and that wasn't fun.
As spring rolled into summer, the cases hit a new low here in my county. This was in part because we were essentially shut down by the state. As counties became safer, it was safe to start to partially open up again. We were in single digit cases. Believe me, there were no lack of complaints about having to postpone life. My feeling was that I did not like it any more than the next person, but we were dealing with a deadly disease which you did not know who had and not. I worked really hard to overcome my health issues, and I was unwilling to undo any of that. I would wait it out. We saw fighting over toilet paper, protests at state capitols, people becoming irate at cashiers making little over minimum wage and still needing to work. I saw ugliness and selfishness in its purest forms. I saw that people were relentless in it. For them, their way of life was much more important than the health and safety implications. I never understood it, and I do not to this day. The first time I was out again with my family was Father's Day. We all sat apart from each other with masks. It was very unusual, though I was just glad to be around people. Sure, I saw my neighbors and we were far away enough from each other that it was safe. And my groups that I participate in moved onto Zoom. It was very nice to be able to connect with people and at leas see their faces. At my job, we got hit hard the first few months. Among other things, we had contracts with several travel and tourism companies who suspended the work we did for them. Other companies were furloughing or laying off people. A co-worker of mine all but quit on the spot, and I was given her responsibilities. That really saved me. Things were slow, but not that bad.
And then came July. Within a matter of 5 days, I lost one of the most significant people in my life. It was unexpected and tragic. Having to deal with something like that is bad under non-pandemic circumstances. It was even worse at the time. I had planned to spend the summer enjoying what was supposed to be my last summer where I am living now. I read a lot during the summer and love to sit out under the stars at night. I never "require" a lot of activities which I am surrounded by people. I did get to see my family for major events like holidays and birthdays. Other than that, I was pretty much by myself. But it was okay, I had everything planned. Life often does not go as planned. And the summer was not quite over with its losses. I had to cope with everything going on confined to four walls. I was kind of zoned out and grieving, so perhaps I was numb to what was happening with COVID.
As the fall came around, it came into birthday and holiday times. One of my family needed essential surgery a week after Thanksgiving, so we did not gather. We did not feel it would be safe. But a week before, we did have an impromptu Thanksgiving celebration with a full dinner. We were able to gather safely for Christmas. I did get to go on some of my favorite activity-light drives. It seemed like this past year, people decorated their houses even more than usual. Maybe they felt it was their way of providing holiday cheer. Perhaps they had more time to devote to it. At any rate, it was still a nice, regular part of the holiday season. Nobody gathered for New Year's Eve, but I didn't care. New Year's Eve is never a significant or meaningful holiday to me.
News of a vaccine got everyone excited. It was like there was light at the end of the tunnel. As of the time I am writing this, they estimate over 80 million people have been vaccinated. Unfortunately, cases are going up in my county as well as my state as a whole. Why? My guess is because we are still not ready to go into the wholesale life we once knew. People are getting careless. I am going to get the vaccine because I want to do everything I can to ensure my health and safety and that I can get back to the non-pandemic life I once new. Note, I did not say "normal." We have heard about "the new normal" and what that means. I have never liked the word normal, anyway. I want to get back to the life I knew before.
If I am being honest, we did not handle this pandemic well as a country. I am quite disappointed. I grew disillusioned at the selfishness I have seen in people. It is not only selfish not to care about others, but it is also selfish when one believes they are above the rules or above suffering. And I am quite concerned that the paranoia about some kind of conspiracy has caused the fringe people to become a movement. I would have never expected us to have these kinds of mainstreamed levels of conspiracy theories in the 80s or even 90s. This year has taken a toll on all of us in many different ways. My hope as of this writing is that we continue to move towards our full way of living and that everyone does their part. I hope this virus is taken seriously by all and that we can have some semblance of order. I wish that those who lost jobs, businesses, and their economic freedom will have that restored to them sooner than later. There is one thing I do believe....
Better days are ahead. Happy Spring! And here is to a time of growth and moving forward, just like the flowers and trees are growing again.
No comments:
Post a Comment