Seasons

 As I sit here, I am looking at the effects of our first snowfall of the 2020-2021 season.  It was pretty last night, some nine days before Christmas.  This is my favorite part of the year.  I think that Thanksgiving is probably my most anticipated holiday, because it kicks of with Santa arriving at Herald Square and kicking off a big one month Christmas celebration.  I love cheesy holiday specials, I love Christmas music, and I am like a big kid riding around seeing people's Christmas decorations.  And if you don't believe me, ask anyone who has ridden in a car with me around the holidays.  Christmas is joyful for me, it brings out the kid in me.  And I love people who love Christmas as much as I do.  

Sadly, in a little bit, this part of the year will be over for me.  And then come the dank months of January and February.  Sure, there are sports to keep me engaged at the time.  But the cheer goes away, the lights go out, and there is a lot of darkness and cold to fill in its place.  I tend to get a bit of depression after the holidays are over, especially the first couple of weeks.  By the time March rolls around, I feel a bit better.  Or, maybe when the Daytona 500 rolls around mid-February.  But it still seems like the endless days and nights of winter for another month or so after that.  I hate the nothingness of it.  And I really, really hate the cold.  I probably will tolerate it a bit more when I move into a house that is less drafty.  I can never really get warm in the winter, at least where I am at now.  I wasn't always like this.  There was a time where I enjoyed the coziness of winter, the idea of being in, etc.  And there wasn't always a time where I loved Christmas, either.  I went through some hellish times in my life where I struggled around the holidays.  I grew up loving Christmas and then the hard times came along.  I couldn't wait for the stress and busyness of the holidays to go away.  I hated the expectations that everything was to be perfect, happy, etc. when millions of us did not feel so perfect.  But when I started to come out of the bad times, the one thing that made me feel alive again was the Christmas holiday.  It might have been the only time at the beginning.  So, I would get really, really depressed after Christmas.  And even though I enjoyed other seasons, Christmas was the one time of the year I consistently felt alive.  

But then I started to grow.  I started to experience life again at its fullest, and with that came the appreciation that I had of old.  I began to appreciate each season (except winter!) for what it brought to my life.  Spring is obviously a sign of new life.  I love the feeling of a warmer day and still getting cool at night.  I love seeing our outdoor friends again who may have been hibernating or away for the winter.  And I absolutely love when the trees start to bloom again.  I love the different pastels that briefly cover the trees and the flowers which start to grow again.  May has always been one of my favorite months.  It is still not tremendously hot, although we can have a few hot spells.  The days get longer, I can enjoy being outside, and the world starts to come alive.  Then comes June, the month of transition.  There are many things about June-graduations and weddings are happy, life-changing events.  As a child and teenager, I loved starting my summer vacation in June.  It meant late nights, late mornings, freedom, and days full of play as a child.  We couldn't wait to all get together in the neighborhood and play.  My friends and I always wanted to sleep at someone else's house; we couldn't get enough of each other.  As an adult, things have changed. No summers off, no playing all the ways that I did when I was young. No more thinking I was going to be the first person who dug to the earth's mantle and having a big hole in the yard.  But I also carry with me some of the things of my childhood.  I get out my old children's mystery books and read them.  I stay out late at night in my yard looking at the stars.  And I still feel the freedom and carefree days-I love that the world is alive and noisy.  I love that everyone can be outside.  Despite the heat, summer is once again my favorite season.  Though, I still have a fondness for fall.  I love the changing of the leaves, I like early fall nights especially.  I love a cool, crisp night and a warm day.  I like the occasional moody sky and dark afternoons.  There are many birthdays in my family in the fall, mine included.  Throw in Halloween, and it is a fun-filled season.  And then comes Thanksgiving once again.

The older I get, the years start to go faster and faster.  I feel like it was just yesterday that I was experiencing the holiday season of 2019.  I had a wonderful one last year, filled with a lot of great experiences, new and old.  This year is a lot different for all of us. I would gladly turn back the clock one year.  I have heard it said that winter is like the nighttime of the seasons, that when we get up in the morning it is then spring.  I have also heard it said that winter is the waiting period for spring.   The snow that falls eventually melts away into the beautiful green grass of spring.  As I go into winter, I am taking that approach.  We have collectively been in winter for a year now.  But there is hope on the horizon.  I am believing that by spring, we will have hope in our lives again, and that things will start to resemble the lives we once knew.

Seasons can be literal, and they can be symbolic.  Right now, we are literally and figuratively in the winter.  But spring is only around three and a half calendar months away.  Rest up, hibernate if you must and get ready, because spring is coming.  I wish you all the best holiday you can have this season.  And more importantly, I wish you a better 2021.  I hope it is filled with the goodness of new things, new life, and whatever you need spring to be.